Thursday, May 3

A Special Day

Today is a special day!  Today is a birthday - the actual would-have-been birth day - of our first child!  It was my due date.  Funny how I don't remember off the top of my head which day I had the miscarriage, but this day, May 3rd, is forever seared in my memory.

I hope the angels have a party for you, Baby.  Sunshine and colorful balloons and fluffy cotton-candy clouds!  Oh, how I miss to see what your face looks like!  

And oh the irony - cruel, cruel irony.  Instead of having a baby in my arms, I am practicing a flip on the trampoline, still a child myself.  Life is very different than it would have been.

Out of six pregnancies that I knew of - my own mom and my mother-in-law included - 5 out of 6 of the babies died (including vanishing twin syndrome and a stillbirth).  With my first pregnancy experience ending in miscarriage, and being surrounded by all these others, it is hard to believe that we can have a 'normal' healthy pregnancy and baby someday.  So I want to introduce to you, on this special day, the baby who brought hope... the ONE baby who lived!!!

Lilly Claire  born March 4, 2012 :)

She is special to me in a deeper way because she signifies LIFE and HOPE and JOY!  And she gives me COURAGE, that maybe next time the outcome will be different; that someday we can have a baby!  (And we will get to meet little Lilly in June!  Yay!!!  Our friends live in far away WI. :P)

Later pictures will be coming of the bulbs we planted that are blooming this week!

2 comments:

  1. Beautifully written Naomi! And it touches my heart as we have just recently been through the same loss. Holding on to hope, joy, courage, life has been so important to us.. a daily choice to keep those in my heart and to keep trusting, and if you have a beautiful little one close by to inspire those things - wonderful! Many prayers and blessings!

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  2. I just read of yours on your latest blog post. :'( I will be praying for you!

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